How to Waste Time

https://www.wikihow.it/Perdere-Tempo

05-09-2024 |
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Time is the only thing that can be measured, saved, bought and sold but which cannot be seen, touched or felt, sometimes you can't even have enough.For this reason, you should only waste time (not to be confused with killing time) when you have already done everything you had to do.If you want to be as less productive as possible, follow these simple steps.

Steps

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1
Plan. Drop everything you were doing and start planning something better.There are plenty of situations you may not be prepared for!Here are some ideas:
- How to decorate your bedroom.
- What to say to Kim-Jong Un the next time you see him.
- Your next vacation.
- How to gain dominion over the Universe.
- What to do during a zombie apocalypse.
  - Okay, seriously.Which friend would you leave to the zombies because he slows you down?What skills should you learn to be safe?They must be useful, the end times are approaching.
2
Do a couple of calculations. What if the numbers in your tax code added up to 66?You can't know if you don't calculate them, right?Hurry up!Here is another list of things you could calculate:
- Your budget.
- How many minutes have you been alive, or how many minutes are left before your birthday, before Christmas, etc.
- How much would you give as a percentage to your loved ones or to charity if you had a million euros.
- How many people do you meet per year and how many do you really like.
3
Imagine crazy situations. You can literally let your mind wander and hope to get something very valuable.You may have imagined yourself as a millionaire on your yacht in the Mediterranean with Arcuri, or doing the job you've always dreamed of, but have you ever tried to push yourself beyond the limits of your creativity?
- Imagine being locked in the bathroom for the next 30 minutes.How would you get out of it?
- Imagine having to give dance lessons or something else to a bear.What methodology would you apply?
- Imagine that you suddenly turned into a werewolf.What would be the first thing you would do?Werewolves don't have much control over their impulses, try to be realistic.
- Imagine having to hunt or having to get food for lunch.What would you end up eating?
- Imagine that everyone around you is wearing a kilt.After all, why not?
4
Make lists. Obviously I'm not talking about the shopping list, that would be useful, here we're talking about lists that you didn't know you could make.Consider some of these hypotheses:
- Make a list of all the words you could write with your name.
- Make a list of the ten most attractive people you know.
- Make a list of the ten ugliest people you know.
- Make a list of questions you would like answered.
- Make a list of people you would arrest if you were a dictator.
5
Memorize something. The first 36 digits of pi?Too simple, we might as well have learned the Fibonacci sequence.Here are some things you could learn by heart (without hurting your finger):
- The order of the books of the Bible.
- The succession of the Kings of England.
- The dates and verdicts of the most important crime cases (Erika and Omar, Erba massacre, The Meredith case, etc.)
- Lyrics to "Stayin' Alive" by the Bee Gees.
  - Who are we kidding?It's very useful!
6
Bring back old memories. Take a minute to sit back, relax and remember the good old days.They're there somewhere, aren't they?
- Try to remember who was with you on the bus this morning, or at the bar when you had coffee.Can you remember it?
- View your bedroom from the bed overhead.What are the strangely empty spaces?
- Remember how your best friend looked when you were young and had a thousand adventures.
- Remember the last time you gave a compliment or laughed or helped someone.
7
Test yourself. Who needs others?Test yourself!Test your skills!You can try some of these ideas:
- See how long you can go without blinking/breathing/talking/using the letter “N”, etc.
- See how many times you can fold a sheet of paper
- Balance objects…on your toes.
- Understand how embarrassing it can be to imitate an animal in public, or walk around with your clothes on backwards, or sing at the top of your lungs.
8
Invent new ways to use the objects around you. The lamp on the desk?It's not just for shedding light, it's also a beautiful hat!And that stapler looks just like a maraca.Take a look around, haven't you taken too many things for what they are?
- The computer power supply?A beautiful new age necklace, or a belt!But the objects around you aren't just clothes.That painting is a table, and those ingredients in the kitchen?They are just waiting to be recombined with recipes invented by you.
9
You have pointless conversations. “Stalin was the best” or “People just can't understand the cultural and anachronistic meaning behind The Babe and the Nerd” they can work very well.Make sure you keep a straight face and choose topics that don't make people realize you're making fun of them.
- Don't go around saying that Starbucks is God's gift to capitalism if you're a committed hipster.Choose a credible topic so that people will want to discuss it.
- You are warned, these types of conversations might (correction:they can definitely) cause you problems if you can't manage them well.Some people may lose the respect they have for you if you spend 5 minutes talking to them about your plan to finance Luca Giurato's university scholarship.Even declaring a political/religious/economic belief that you don't believe in at all can lead to problems.
10
Get on the computer. Now things get serious:The Internet was invented specifically to waste time.If we had a list of how to waste time on the internet, we would fall into an endless cycle of anti-productivity.
- Read blogs.There are blogs on practically everything in this world.Switch from one blog to another randomly, many have a special button.
- Take some quizzes, tests, surveys, or find some games.But only if you have already checked what the new trends are on Facebook.
- Perform a self-diagnosis on Wikipedia.Make sure you have your phone handy so you can call your mom and give her a good scare!
- You could even read the news, but that would make too much sense.
- If all these things are too obvious, you can always do hard drive defragmentation and watch it until completion.It will take taaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat.Doing a nice virus scan and data backup is also a good way to waste time.
11
Take the wikiHow challenge. wikiHow is not part of the internet, it's much better.But you already knew this.So why get stuck in the dangers and mediocrities of cyberspace when you could very well stay here and benefit from it?Are you ready?Ready, set, go!
- How long does it take you to get from “How to Shower” to “Taking Control of Your Rampant Camel”?And from “Put on makeup like Clio” to “Improve your personality with wikiHow”?
  - Remember, you can only click on links that are on the page you're already on.Like the Wikipedia game, but much more fun.
12
Plan a prank. This too can create problems if done carefully.Make sure you prank the right person at the right time.When you're sure, think about what object to put in the jelly!Mmm.
- Think outside the box!Lemon juice in toothpaste?Move all the items on someone's desk two inches to the left?Something that ends up with glitter scattered all over?Some jokes require special materials, do you have a lot of time to waste on them?
13
Do everything in slow motion. I bet you 10 euros that you'll get bored before everyone else.But try it anyway!Good luck with that cup of coffee!
- If you don't like things in slow motion, try doing things in reverse.Talk backwards, walk backwards, you decide (eat backwards?Better not).Or do everything the other way around.What is the opposite of reading wikiHow articles?
14
You annoy people. You could spend so many hours on this site learning how to annoy people that you might wonder if your entire life has been a huge waste of time up until this exact moment.What are you waiting for?Stop memorizing the digits of pi, you have other things to do!
- Okay, when we say “annoying,” we actually mean in a sweet and fun way.It means pretending to be a mime every hour of the hour, not being constantly late for appointments with friends just to make them turn the so-called.It means talking to the monkeys at the natural history museum, not changing their position and getting thrown out.Enjoy fun that has fun consequences, not criminal ones.
15
Think of fun ways to do things. Humans are programmed to be as efficient as possible;for most situations, at least.By now you will have understood more or less how this "life" story works, but are there other ways to achieve goals?
- How could you wake up in the morning without an alarm clock?
- How could you text a friend without your phone or computer.
- How could you get to the kitchen without touching the floor?
16
You do things only to undo them. Dig a hole and then fill it.Arrange the books on the shelf by author and then by cover color.Make the bed and jump in.Write an article on wikiHow and delete it before publishing.The world is your home.If you have a little inventiveness, use it.
- This is the ultimate waste of time.Go, put all the stuff in the doors, even if you know that your mother will make you put it back this evening.Paint a picture and cover it with more paint (Van Gogh?It's you?).Add sarcastic comments to the first wikiHow article that pops up after clicking “Random Article” and then undo the edit.Why… why not?
17
Read this article from cover to cover. Congratulations!You have reached the end of this article!You've already wasted a good 20 minutes trying to waste time!AND you didn't even know that you were losing it while you were losing it!Very good.What a great time to be alive.What does it feel like?Would you do it again if you could?
- It's okay if you say no.You probably have things to do now.Assignments?A shower?Save the world?(do it, for goodness sake).Strength and courage, Time Wasters, knowing that time is your slave, and not vice versa.You can do whatever you want with it.
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Advice

Take a look out the window, you might be surprised at the amount of things you never noticed.
If someone asks you what you are doing, reply, “I was just thinking about the global economic downturn over the last ten years and how greenhouse gases are gradually and inexorably destroying the ozone layer.”No one will disturb you, and you can continue wasting time staring into space.Others will think you're looking for a way to stop evil greenhouse gases and allow you to ponder your political and scientific ruminations.
Set a personal freediving record, and then break it.Do it and do it again.
Repeat words until they lose their meaning, make the whole world lose meaning!People might look at you badly.
Go online and search for games, build a website, or edit wikiHow pages.Do all the searches you've always wanted to do on Google, look up your favorite TV shows on IMDB or Wikipedia.
Re-read this article and see how long it takes you to memorize it all.Then put it into practice.This way you will waste triple the time!
Try setting soap bubbles on fire.Make a mixture of soap and water and use a straw to blow bubbles, then try setting it on fire.Better to do it outside.
Think about thoughts.How do they work so well, how does the brain record so much information?
Look at the sky:go outside and look for funny shaped clouds, or some camouflaged UFOs.
Take photos of everyday objects, but from different and new angles.
Hide some money.Take some pennies and hide them in places no one would look.
Go to Tumblr.Register, follow someone and while away the hours there.
Try having a conversation with yourself, you might discover things about yourself that you didn't know!
Play table tennis against the wall.
Rubbing your hands is perfect.Walk around pretending to be busy!
Try doing something difficult but effective, like practicing one-arm raises.
Stare intently at what you are working on, or at the paper you are supposed to write the assignment on.People, watching you stare so intently, will think you're thinking about something.
No matter what happens, DO NOT look at the clock.Otherwise time will pass much, much slower.In fact, it's better to cover all the clocks until you're done wasting time.(Note:don't do it if you have an appointment and can't be late)
Daydream:Think about all the “IFS” in your life.When you're done, move on to all the "BUTs"!
Remember that “Wasting time is not wasting time”, as John Lennon said

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Warnings

Wasting too much time prevents you from doing useful things.Do the useful things first, and then waste time.
Wasting time can cause depression, loneliness and isolation, when combined with low self-esteem and feelings of disappointment in oneself.
Wasting too much time, especially on the internet, can cause a loss of social life.
Wasting too much time at school or university can cause you problems, and even failure.
Wasting too much time at work can lead to dismissal.
Remember that the time you waste will never be returned to you.Life is shorter than you imagine.

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